The term "worldly" is hugely insulting and prejudicial to anyone who is not a JW.
Reopened Mind
loading the language is a propogandist tactic to trigger a reaction in the mind.
a prime example is the word 'apostate'!.
i have been called 'spiritually weak' for quitting field service, meetings etc.. how would you respond (without swearing or giving a punch up the hooter), if you were called this?.
The term "worldly" is hugely insulting and prejudicial to anyone who is not a JW.
Reopened Mind
i would assume that some or a good number of us here as normal humans in this society - consider " lawless " actions to include murder , robbery, extortion, rape, child abuse, war , terrorism, etc.
the wt society has their own definition of what's considered " lawless ".
anything that's considered a disfellowshipping offense in the jehovah's witnesses is now considered " lawless ".
So I find in this that the WT society is doing what ALL cults do by requiring members to NOT have contact with former members of their cult by use of fear and guilt tactics . Bottom line is the WT society doesn't want JW's being influenced by TRUTHFUL information that DFed or DAed people may bring to them. so they scare rank and file JW's $hitless thinking these DFed ones are " lawless " or " evil".
This article screams
PARANOIA
Paranoia -- a psychosis marked by delusions and irrational suspicion
Reopened Mind
with the new " overlap generation " theory that the wt society is pushing onto rank and file jehovah's witnesses since last year this article i found really heavy hitting in the jw version of the wt.
the wt society is leaking oil in that confidence is low among jw's in not really buying into the " generation overlap " theory as many younger jw's are exiting the organization.
so what better way to try reeling members back in by giving them an article entitled " do not deceive yourself with false reasoning " !
To illustrate , imagine you are expecting guests. Anticipation of their visit may lead to a flurry of activity as you attend to necessary household chores related to their stay. However, then you receive word that your visitors are delayed. Will you abandon the preparations ?
This reminds me of the time I had invited a couple to dinner. After I had prepared dinner they called and cancelled. There was no emergency. They just decided to accept another invitation. I never invited them again. Am I still waiting for them to come? Heck no!
Reopened Mind
in respects to the dubs.
what kind of things did you miss out on, accomplish?
for me, i probably would because now i'm free and while in i met my wonderful wife (who is also free) of 18 years.
I assume you mean, "Would I be a JW if I knew then what I know now." Thirty seven years ago there was no way to know what I know now. Instead of regretting my decision to become a JW I need to look ahead to the future I have now.
As tec said, "It was an experience, and I learned from it."
Reopened Mind
i would assume that some or a good number of us here as normal humans in this society - consider " lawless " actions to include murder , robbery, extortion, rape, child abuse, war , terrorism, etc.
the wt society has their own definition of what's considered " lawless ".
anything that's considered a disfellowshipping offense in the jehovah's witnesses is now considered " lawless ".
One of the characteristics of a cult is that they redefine words. The WT has the audacity to call it the "pure language".
Is smoking lawless?
Is celebrating birthdays, mothers day, fathers day, Christmas, etc, lawless?
Is taking a blood transfusion lawless?
These are disfellowshipping offenses.
Didn't Jesus himself associate with a Samaritan woman and a tax collector, both considered "lawless" by contemporary Jewish standards?
In finality the next paragraph drives the point home to other JW's. It states, " By cutting off contact with the disfellowshipped or dissassociated one, you are showing that you hate the attitudes and actions that led to that outcome.
You have to differentiate between hating the person and hating what he has done. To do that you must TALK to him to explain what it is you disapprove. By shunning you show that you hate the person. Often time there is a problem which needs professional help which the elders are neither qualified to give or recognize. My husband was an elder and he often lamented that he didn't know how to help the brothers and sisters. He has told several to seek outside professional help.
Such articles make my (non-transfused) blood boil! They really have no business telling us to have no contact with df family members. They are overstepping their own principle of headship.
Reopened Mind
my decision to de-program my mind, about a year ago, has been fairly uneventfull, despite a few intense but very real conversations with my wife and parents.. however in the past couple days my father has pretty much made it clear to me that he will put the gb (not god, although they are pretty much viewed the same) before me.
also tonight the inlaws, who have probly gotten whiff of my inactivity and who never get personal, started to give a lecture on the extreme importance of the family worship arrangement so lovingly arranged for us by the fds, and how if we are not taking advantage of this wonderful provision will not be prepared for armagedon.
i swear blood was gushing from biting my tounge.. im starting to sense that consequences are coming for my sin of independent research and study.
Ranmac;
There was song that was popular when I was a teenager in the sixties. It went something like this;
Freedom isn't free
Freedom isn't free
You have to pay the price
You have to sacrifice
For your liberty.
Only you can decide if you want to pay the price. Most here say it's worth it. For most JWs their love and friendship are conditional. Make some outside friends if you haven't already. You're right though, family division is the worst.
I too wish you the best.
Let us know how things turnn out for you.
Reopened Mind
i wasn't born in.
i got hooked in as a teenager.
was going through a tough time, wondered why we exist, why god wasn't doing anything to solve man's problems, if there was a true religion and, hey-presto, a jw classmate showed up with book that not only asked the questions i was asking but answered them too!.
WHAT GOT ME HOOKED:
A classmate gave me the book "Did Man Get Here by Evolution or by Creation?". We debated for a long time as I at the time believed in evolution. After I read her book I became convinced that creation was right. I was about 14 or 15. I read some pro evolution books trying to disprove what she was telling me. Because in the science texts at the time (mid sixties) there were many gaps in the fossil record and Piltdown Man had been shown to be a hoax, her arguments sounded convincing. So I began to change my beliefs. She then invited me to the Kingdom Hall and introduced me to the new publication "The Truth That Leads to Eternal Life" which she studied with me. My parents opposed the study but by then their persecution was "proof" of God's approval.
WHAT MADE ME LEAVE:
Fast forward to 2007, 40 years later. I read an article in our local newspaper referencing Kerry Louderback-Wood and her opposition to the JW teaching regarding refusal of blood transfusions. In the article was a link to www.ajwrb.org. I investigated. Not only did I read everything on that site, but I followed the links and kept reading and reading. A big part of that reading was lurking here on JWN. Everything I had been taught from the WT began to unravel. But I had a problem. My husband was the PO. And he was a born in. How could I start telling him that I no longer thought the Society was God's channel? I kept it strictly to myself for awhile. Then he started bringing up how he couldn't accept the story of a global flood. So I started researching information on the Biblical flood. Soon I felt comfortable enough to bring up other concerns as did he. While we have not officially left the organization we are planning our fade.
Reopened Mind
i had a lot of anger towards them for a good amount of time.
but now, i like to think about the good times we had.
i like to think about their attributes i admired.
I had (believe I still have, at least until the big announcement) one very good JW friend. I had confided in her so much that I gave her a magnet that said, "You'll always be my best friend, you know too much." We have not been in the same congregation for several years but have always kept in touch. I last saw her about six months ago. She is still thoroughly indoctrinated. She doesn't have a clue about my fading. I would love to share with her what I have learned, but realize that everyone must reach their own conclusions in their own time.
Most of the others I can either take or leave. Many are genuinely good people who are just under the influence of a mind-controlled cult.
Meantime my and my husband's fading must proceed slowly so we don't leave behind our sons and their families.
FlyingHighNow: Loved the Lost in Space clip. It was one of my favorite shows in my preJW years.
Reopened Mind
our jw contact sent us the " witness only " wt's again and i just had to make a thread on this mind numbing article.
starting on pg.22 in the jan.15th it deals with " coping with discouragement ".
it seems lots of jw's are under intense stress these days ( can you blame them ?
Flipper you really nailed this one.
I remember the circuit assembly TotallyADD is talking about. I was on the same part as Super Elder. My experience seemed insignificant compared to his. I, too, felt discouraged as I felt I was doing all I could to pioneer, make all the meetings and raise our 2 boys.
As an aside, if God was going to let us know that Armageddon was "close" or "soon", why is it close on his time schedule and not on ours? After all we only live 70 or 80 years on average. "Soon" to us would not be 130 years or more. When we promise our five year old a trip to the park we don't mean when he turns 50!
a year after my parents were baptized i was born in 1954. that same year my father was appointed presiding overseer and remained in that position until the early sixties despite the fact he was still smoking.
he gained the position by default because he was the only baptized man who could read.
thus began my life course of abuse, neglect and cult thinking.
One month before my eighth birthday a friend close to my age was visiting from out of town and came over to play with me. Things were going well when suddenly I could not find him. I ran over to the PO's trailer. Without knocking I walked in. I caught this man standing over my friend stark naked. The man started screaming at me not to move as he was fumbling to put his pants on. Just before he was able to grab me I ran out of the trailer. He chased me. Just before I got to the back door of our house he grabbed me and threw me to the ground, jumped on top of me and started strangling me. I was not able to breathe and I thought I was going to die. He must have realized what he was doing and he stopped choking me. At this point he told me I'd better not say anything to my parents or anybody else because he only lived a few feet from our house and he could come in at night and kill me. I remember picking myself up off the ground, dragging myself to my bedroom, and sitting on the the edge of my bed shaking and wondering why Jehovah hated me and I knew he was going to kill me soon at armageddon.
What TotallyADD doesn't say is that it took months of therapy for him to remember this incident. He knew he had buried something as he learned he was suffering from Post Traumatic Stress. He was relieved when it finally came to light and through therapy he gained the tools to deal with it. We walked around and around our neighborhood as he struggled to cope with his past. Not having grown up a Witness I found much of his experience hard to believe. However since after reading many of your experiences here and elsewhere I have come to realize that not only was he not exaggerating, but he probably has not told the half of it.
Reopened Mind, wife of TotallyADD